Bride To Be Blog 2: How We Met, Finding “The One”, Feminism vs Christianity? & More

Hey guys,

I know, I know. Very long time, no blog. I apologise for my absence, it wasn’t planned at all. I took a bit of a break from blogging throughout March and April to focus on other priorities and getting my life together (a lot has happened in the last two months, more to come on that later). However, today’s blog post was highly requested when I got engaged. If you haven’t read the first couple of posts in my Bride To Be Blog series where I shared the “story” of how my fiancé proposed and my celibacy experience, feel free to check those out before this one.

Now onto your FAQs:

How long have you and your fiancé been together?

It’ll be 5 years this August.

Continue reading “Bride To Be Blog 2: How We Met, Finding “The One”, Feminism vs Christianity? & More”

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2 Influential Women In The Bible That Are Not Proverbs 31 – #IWD2018

Hey guys!

Happy International Women’s Day and a special shout out to all the wonderful women and young ladies that are reading today. I have partnered with Boohoo who kindly sent me this statement WOMAN t-shirt I am proudly wearing. It’s one simple word on a plain white tee, but it conveys a powerful message which I’ll share more of my perspective on later.

This International Women’s Day, Boohoo is supporting Wonder Foundation – a charity that strives to empower disadvantaged women, girls and communities through education. The WOMAN t-shirt and others launches today and £5 from your purchase will be donated to Wonder. Show your support for a great cause, purchase your WOMAN tees for you and a friend here!

Now onto today’s topic. As a Christian, in the past I’ve battled with myself about what it actually means to be a “godly woman”. Can we actually learn anything from biblical women and are their struggles even relevant to ours today? Contrary to popular belief that the Bible is a restrictive rulebook that oppresses women, I have since learned so much about the essence of Christian womanhood through studying particular female figures throughout the Bible. Women are strong; women are beautiful; women are intricately and intentionally designed; through women, men exist; women are just so wonderful.

We often take our ideal characteristics about what a godly woman should resemble from the well-known passage in Proverbs chapter 31, verses 10 to 31. Now don’t get me wrong, I too absolutely love this passage and I agree that there is so much wisdom to yield from it. So much so, that I would like to delve a bit deeper into breaking down those scriptures perhaps in a future blog post if that’s something you would like to learn more about? (Let me know in the comments down below).

But the Bible’s depiction of women doesn’t just start and end in Proverbs 31. There are inspirational women figures throughout the Word being courageous, fearless, wise and influential vessels of God. Hence, today I want to shed some light on two of my personal favourites:

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Priscilla

We learn of Priscilla in Acts 18. Priscilla is influential because her marriage was a ministry that taught people about Jesus; she was a hard worker; an evangelist; a good teacher and a good student. So who is she?

Continue reading “2 Influential Women In The Bible That Are Not Proverbs 31 – #IWD2018”

What Nobody Is Telling You About Celibacy & Waiting Until Marriage To Have Sex!

Hey guys,

Welcome to March! Today I thought I’d finally drop a long awaited blog post on a controversial topic. Please continue reading with an open mind and I hope it blesses you in some way 💖

Following the video I made last year about celibacy* where I shared some advice on how to build intimacy in a premarital relationship without having sex, I want to now talk about the more unspoken parts of waiting until marriage to have sex.

Two extremely important mini disclaimers before we begin! Firstly, *I’m aware that usually, the words “celibacy” and “abstinence” are used interchangeably by most people. They do have slightly different proper meanings. Celibacy usually refers to a conscious decision to not have sex for religious reasons, whereas abstinence is not always attached to religion and is the conscious decision to not have sex for a period of time. For the purpose of this blog post, if I say “celibate”, I essentially just mean waiting until marriage to have sex to honour God with your body.

Photographer: Jesse Konadu Photography | Instagram | Website

Secondly, it goes without saying but for the avoidance of doubt, I am not here to bash or demonise sex. I say this because I have personally had to unlearn so many misconstrued ideologies and negative connotations about sex. I do believe that a lot of churches have generally failed to portray sex accurately in an attempt to discourage premarital sex. As a Christian, I view sex as a gift from God, designed purposefully to be enjoyed and explored within the boundaries of marriage. It is one of the greatest expressions of the oneness between husband and wife that is described all throughout the Bible in Genesis, Mark and Ephesians for example.

So I personally need no additional convincing that when you’re married, you can and should enjoy sex to it’s full capacity. Do not hold back or be ashamed. However I have grown tired and concerned with the fetishisation of virginity and being celibate. Even if it has become a trend, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, I am a proponent for understanding why we do what we do and not just blindly copying the cool kids. I just want to give an honest perspective today.

Here are the things I wish more Christians would tell you about waiting until marriage to have sex…

— It can make or break your relationship

Continue reading “What Nobody Is Telling You About Celibacy & Waiting Until Marriage To Have Sex!”

Common Mistakes New Bloggers Make (And Tips To Avoid Them) – Running Out Of Steam!

Hey guys,

One of my personal goals this year is to continue to build my blog, with a particular focus on scaling up and adding value to you guys wherever I can. I often get asked very specific questions about blogging. I’m no expert but I am making a conscious effort to read more and learn more, with the intention of sharing that knowledge with you. After receiving a lot of positive feedback from this Instagram post where I shared my answer to the FAQ: I want to start a blog but I don’t know what to talk about. How do I choose a topic? I have decided to extend the tips to my blog as a series. So let’s get started.

I’ve been blogging seriously for just under 2 years now and there are sooo many things I wish I knew on day 1 of this journey. *Take the word mistakes lightly! I totally understand that not everyone blogs for the same reasons or with the same goals in mind.* These are just a few general points that may help, and that I personally wish I knew sooner.

I’ll be breaking these points down into separate blog posts so it’s easier to digest. Here’s the first mistake:

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Mistake #1: Running out of steam; starting strong and then dropping off

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This is such a big one! I’m guilty of it too, take my YouTube channel for example lol. When I first started blogging I genuinely thought I’d be bursting with inspiration, motivation and energy to create content constantly. But the reality is, for most people it just doesn’t work like that. Ask any creative person! Creating is a process which is quite difficult to force (for me personally).

As a result of this harsh reality, many people hastily start something and then suddenly stop, just as quickly as they started. It’s such a shame and it saddens me, particularly when the content is (well, was) good. So how can we avoid burning out… our content quickly drying up… and running out of steam?

The first thing I suggest is to think carefully if you can really commit to this thing before you start.

In the context of being a disciple, the Bible aptly calls it, “counting the costs” before beginning:

“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? For if you lay the foundation and are not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule you, saying, ‘This person began to build and wasn’t able to finish.’ …” — Read the whole passage Luke 14:25-34

Now blogging is not as serious as the commitment of discipleship. Ha! Far from. However, Jesus shares applicable points about commitment… won’t you first sit down and consider your ability? Do you have the time and capacity or do you need to create it? Once you’ve properly considered this before starting, you’ll theoretically have a stronger conviction to see your project through.

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Another way to avoid running out of steam prematurely is to meticulously plan ahead.

I always encourage new bloggers to draft at least 10 blog posts before “launching” their blog. That way, you have a grace period to create more content whilst you’re releasing what you already have drafted. But realistically, 10 posts isn’t even enough and I’ll explain why. At best, that’s approximately only 2 months worth of content by some people’s standards. So why stop planning there? I recommend creating a 1 Year Plan detailing the type of content that you want to create over the coming 12 months. It doesn’t have to be a dissertation, but do make sure you have a backlog of ideas. It’s all about ideas. Draft as much as you can and as often as you can, seriously. You will really thank yourself on those days when you’re having a creative block and you lack inspiration.

Next, you need to identify your creativity triggers.

When do you create your best work and what hinders you from creating your best work? Is it when you’re in a cafe, when you’re listening to music, at 3am in your bedroom, on your commute to and from your 9-5 job? When is it? For me, I really struggle to write when I’m in a bad mood. I’m working on not letting my output be impacted by my emotions but until then, I actively seize every opportunity to blog when I feel happy. But if you lack discipline and you don’t want your blog to suffer, I personally recommend coming up with some kind of content schedule ASAP. Some people prefer to write when they feel like it and post when they feel like it, but for those of you that value the importance of consistency, learn to schedule your posts in advance! Especially if your content is written or audio – nobody will care if you post something that you drafted/recorded 4 weeks ago, people just want to see new content, frequently. It’s a lot harder for your audience to detect and potentially be put off by you creating “bulk” content on blogs than it is on YouTube, which is more visual for example.

My final nugget is my favourite tip and probably the most important thing I will share today. If you take nothing else from this post, remember this:

KNOW YOUR WORTH AND WHOLEHEARTEDLY BELIEVE IN YOUR CRAFT.

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Yes. It does sound painfully obvious but I honestly believe this is the route of why most new bloggers run out of steam. A lot of us quit prematurely because we’re insecure about our craft. We don’t believe we’re talented enough, we are overly critical to a fault, we don’t celebrate every small victory and we’re far too busy focusing on what other people are achieving (oh comparison is a huge topic which we’ll discuss in depth in another post, don’t you worry).

In summary, I need you to stop doubting yourself. If you followed my first tip, which is to be sure that you’re ready to make this commitment, then stick to it. The fact is, you’re only ever as good as you think you are and there is so much power in self belief. Having true confidence in yourself as a content creator can propel you into doing amazing things, walking in your purpose and really serving people to the best of your ability. You can do this, keep telling yourself everyday that you are worthy if that’s what it’s going to take to believe it.  

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So that’s it for today’s post. Upcoming common issues I will be tackling in this series for new bloggers includes unhealthy comparison, coming up with a promotional strategy, networking and providing value to your audience. If you enjoyed this, let me know! And most importantly, if you have a related question, please leave a comment down below or contact me. 


For any seasoned bloggers reading, what is one thing you wish you knew before you started blogging? What are some of the biggest lessons you’ve learned so far? 

And for any newbie bloggers reading, what are the major challenges and road blocks you’re currently facing in blogging?

And if you’re not a blogger, share your thoughts on the topic in the comment section down below too. Your opinion is still always appreciated round here lol. 


God bless you!

Wunms.

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. – Ephesians 3:20-21


P.S. My stock images are from CreateHerStock.com, a great resource to get free, blogger friendly stock images of black women! 

The Best Pancake Recipe Ever: Fluffy Buttermilk Pancakes

Hey guys,

Another year, another recipe for you to try out this Pancake Day! Last year I shared with you one of my favourite ways to eat pancakes and this year I’m sharing a recipe that’s new to me. I’ve always loved “American” pancakes, the kind that are stacked super high, are soft, fluffy and filling. The kind that you’ll see being sold for £15 in London brunch spots 😫 *clutches purse*.

But I’ve never thought to make them myself until now. It’s the perfect Big Breakfast and I think it would make a really nice Valentine’s Day gesture. It was also surprisingly easy to achieve the desired thickness and inside fluffy texture using the following recipe adapted from PopSugar .

This recipe makes 12 small-medium size pancakes.

Prep time: 15 minutes

Cooking time: 30 minutes (or less if you’ve got skillsss like that)


Ingredients

To make the pancake batter:

  • Self raising flour (2 cups)
  • Granulated sugar (2 tablespoons)
  • Baking soda (2 teaspoons)
  • Baking powder (1/2 teaspoon)
  • Salt (1/4 teaspoon) – I think this ingredient is pretty unnecessary but you can add it for the culture I guess..
  • Eggs (2)
  • Buttermilk (2 cups)
  • Oil/butter for cooking
  • Salted butter (1/2 cup, melted and cooled slightly)

*I know there is lactofree milk in the photo above but we didn’t actually end up using that*

Serving suggestion:

  • Bacon
  • Sausages
  • Syrup

Before you start here’s a few useful tips:

Try to use a good non stick pan. Whether you’re using oil or butter to cook the pancakes, don’t add too much! The first pancake usually turns out the worst because it soaks up all your oil but don’t worry about that. I personally didn’t add any more oil after the first pancake and it lasted for the whole batter.

Method

Wet ingredients: in one bowl whisk together your flour, sugar, salt, baking powder and baking soda.

Dry ingredients: in another bowl whisk together your eggs, buttermilk and slightly cooled melted butter.

Then add the contents of your wet ingredients bowl to your dry ingredients bowl like so.

Make sure you whisk together everything thoroughly for the best results, you don’t want to see any lumps left in the batter. This part can be tiring without an electric whisk but keep going, it’s worth it.

You should be left with something that looks like this. A thick batter mixture, but not so thick that it doesn’t drip. If it’s too thick, you can thin it out by adding a tiny bit of water.

Now onto the cooking. This is absolutely the make or break moment of your pancakes. You can have the best batter in the world but if you can’t execute on the pan, it’s game over 😅.

Grease your frying pan with oil or butter and pour the batter onto the pan using a ladle. Cook each pancake for 1-2 minutes on a low to medium heat. Watch them carefully, it’s so easy to burn! Tip: when you start to see the batter bubbling, it’s usually time to flip the pancake over.

The failed first pancake lol.

Serving suggestion

Add sausages, bacon and syrup. Serve warm.

Ta da!

Once you’ve successfully made homemade pancakes, store bought will never taste the same again.


Let me know if you decide to try this recipe out, I’d love to see photos.

How do you like your pancakes? Let me know in the comments down below.

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God bless you!

Wunms

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength. – Proverbs 17:22

Get To Know Me – 3 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Wunms

Hey guys,

hope everyone is doing well? I’m currently on a long train ride so I thought I would use this time productively and write. We hit 25,000 views on the blog recently which is so cool man, I can’t say enough how much I appreciate the support. I’m aware that even though it’s been a year and a half, some of you still don’t really know that much about me! One of my “blog goals” this year is to make a conscious effort to be more transparent, engage and create more of an open dialogue with you. So today’s post is inspired by Kemi of skylish.co.uk (check out her blog – it’s amazing and you’ll love it!). I’ll be sharing 3 things about myself that you probably didn’t know. Here goes:

1. My music taste is really diverse

When people ask “what sort of music are you into?” I find it quite difficult to narrow down the genres. I like so much. My absolute favourite genre of music ever is probably gospel R&B but I also really love afrobeats, motown-sounding music, even some soft “indie pop”. To give you an idea of my taste, some musicians that I’m always happy to listen to include Alessia Cara; Adekunle Gold; Maleek Berry; The Script (I miss them!!); JP Cooper and Sean C Johnson to name a few.

2. I don’t have a dramatic testimony, God just chose me

I know many people have really interesting and profound testimonies detailing how they came to Christ but mine is quite simple. I thank God all the same. Here’s how it went… I’ve been a “Christian” for as long as I can remember, but obviously it doesn’t work like that. My mum introduced me to church and Christianity just made sense to me. Sure I had a lot of questions growing up, but slowly but surely God started to reveal Himself to me in such a way that I couldn’t doubt His existence. We formed a personal relationship and I started to get to know God for myself, not just on Sundays. My faith has changed my outlook on life drastically. I no longer view my life as a selfish rat race because ultimately, I’m here to serve. My earliest recollection of properly deciding that I want to completely live for Christ is surprisingly quite late, it was towards the end of sixth form, so I was 17 years old. During that time in my life I was surrounded by a sea of sin, my peers were not trying to be about this Jesus life at all to put it simply. It wasn’t “cool”. Or rather, it was more acceptable to be a lukewarm Christian. It’s not even that there weren’t many good influences around me, but there were far more negative influences and a lot of temptation. Everyday I was convicted. God said I had to make a decision about how I want to live and I heard Him loud and clear: live for Me or the world, you can’t do both. The rest is kind of history but still an ongoing journey… I got water baptised in March last year.

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3. I’m actually not a “girly girl”

I’m not sure whether this will be surprising to you or not but yeah, it’s the truth. Deep down I’m just not a girly girl. Growing up with two brothers, I was naturally deemed a bit rough around the edges – for a girl. I personally don’t believe you should put people in a box like that but I didn’t enjoy stereotypical “girly” things e.g. playing with dolls and making daisy chains. I loved playing football at lunchtime with all the boys and I was happy doing it. I quickly developed a trainer/sneaker obsession, I used to run track (giving up athletics is one of my biggest regrets mistakes) and to this day I still prefer wearing flats to heels. Granted, I’m not as active as I once was, but given the opportunity, I’m usually keen to play sports and I can be quite competitive lol. Furthermore, my day-to-day personal style hinges on being comfortable. I do however still like to play around with makeup, I just feel the most free in my own skin. As I’ve gotten older I’ve accepted that there’s really nothing wrong with being fluid with the stereotypical “male” and “female” traits you exhibit. I enjoy makeup but I’m also happy to go barefaced regularly, I wear skirts on trainers and super elegant evening dresses, I love changing my nail polish… all at the same time.

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Shop my look | Similar Blazer | Similar Jeans | Similar Polka Dot Blouse | Knee-High Boots | Bag

Thanks for reading! I hope you learned something new about me. Let me know if you enjoy these kind of posts (because I love reading them).

Now it’s your turn to tell me something about yourself – what kind of music are you into? Do you have a testimony? Share them in the comments down below 🙂


God bless you!

Wunms.

The Lord says: “These people come near to me with their mouth and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is based on merely human rules they have been taught. Therefore once more I will astound these people with wonder upon wonder; the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish.” – Isaiah 29:13-14

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Affordable 2018 Winter Jacket: £15 Long Hooded Puffer

Hey guys,

Hope everyone is doing well.

I teased this look in my last blog post and on my Instagram so here’s the 411. I’ve been getting so many compliments on this coat since the moment I wore it out for the first time on Christmas Day. But before I get into the details, I have to say a huge thank you to The Han Aesthetic for taking these photos. We were out in the rain so if you see raindrops on my outfit… they’re very real lol (the things I do for you guys!😅☔️)

I’ve tried and tested this coat for over a month so here’s how I styled it and my thoughts on all the items I’m wearing:

Black on black on black:

Continue reading “Affordable 2018 Winter Jacket: £15 Long Hooded Puffer”

Your Comfort Zone Is Killing Your Growth

Hey guys, happy Monday and happy New Year!

I’m back with some musings for your morning – today we’re going to be talking about The Comfort Zone Killer. Why? Because there’s no time like the present to check yourself. By staying in your comfort zone and being too fearful to try something different, you are getting left behind, whether you know it or not.

Being outside of your comfort zone will test your faith. | Photography: The Han Aesthetic

Continue reading “Your Comfort Zone Is Killing Your Growth”

“So How Was Your 2017, Wunms?”

It’s that time of year again (so soon I know 😂) where I reflect on the highs and not-so-highs, lessons and general experiences of 2017.

I’m finishing 2017 in such a different position to how I started. I’m really a working, soon-to-be-married, young woman with a thriving side hustle now! Soo much has happened this year so I’m going to break it down into sections about weddings & marriage, driving, starting full-time work and blogging, to make it easier/hopefully more interesting for you to digest. Grab a snack and enjoy!


Catching Flights, Not Pneumonia

Continue reading ““So How Was Your 2017, Wunms?””