7 Ways To Practice Self-Love, Starting Now!

Growing up I thought that “loving yourself” was a very normal, innate thing that comes naturally to us all. I thought that loving others was supposed to be the tricky part! In fact, one of my earliest recollections of Sunday School/Childrens’ Church is being taught to: love your neighbour as you love yourself (Mark 12:31). So when I heard that commandment, it kind of cemented in me this belief that loving yourself was a given, you know?

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Alas. I am older, I am wiser (I hope, lol). I’ve realised that for many of us, from our formative years and even beyond, loving yourself is not quite so simple unfortunately (which is probably why we often fall so short of loving each other!) If you’re new to my blog, I’ve spoken openly in the past about some of my previous insecurities for example body image, feeling beautiful without makeup and how I’ve learned to embrace who I am through practising self-love and care. In the same way you can teach love, you can teach hate. We could get into the ins and outs of why some of us struggle to love ourselves — societal pressure, comparison, negative social media influences, abuse etc.  — but that’s a deep discussion for another day.

Today however, I want to change the narrative and share 7 ways to practice self-love, starting right now (well… after you finish reading this blog post). Go!

Source: 2013 Shay Cochrane

1. Be grateful

No matter where you are in life, give thanks (1 Thess. 5:18). Things could always be worse. Task: At the start of each day, list a few of the things in your life that you’re grateful for, before thinking about what you hope to still achieve. My friend once advised me that it’s also handy to keep a diary/note of all the great things that happen to you so you can reflect annually. 

 

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2. Compliment yourself

Whether it is internal or external, find qualities and features about yourself that you genuinely like. Task: If you start by picking just one thing you like about yourself every day, by the end of July you’ll already have 20 things! 

3. Work on yourself

Along with complimenting yourself, you have to keep improving your flaws and weaknesses because complacency breeds mediocrity. Dream bigger; educate yourself; hone your craft; set goals and work towards actually achieving them! We’re not a finished product, we’re on a journey and therefore a work-in-progress, not a work-in-stagnation.

4. Celebrate yourself

Every win is still a win, it doesn’t matter how big or small it is! Congratulate yourself for ticking something off and again, go back to point 1. and be grateful about it. At the same time, don’t be so hard on yourself if/when things don’t go according to plan.

 

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5. Look after yourself

This is a biggie! A huge part of loving yourself involves protecting and upholding your very being. Lots of things in life can be a drain on us so looking after yourself includes everything from your appearance and upkeep, your ability to rest, your choice of friends and company, the food and drink you take in, the music you listen to, the places you go etc. Ask yourself, how are these things serving you positively and preserving your being? If they’re not, re-evaluate their existence as a means to looking after yourself.

6. Get to know yourself

One of the coolest things about life is the journey of self discovery. As we age, we evolve both physically and mentally so in loving yourself, you should get to know what is unique about you and what makes you tick. What do you like to do for fun, what are your talents and areas for development, what are your limits etc. Task: Make it a point to spend quality time with yourself on a weekly basis. This means purposely taking yourself away from social settings and constant interaction with others in order to develop a deeper understanding of who you truly are. I like to call it “quiet time” but it doesn’t necessarily have to occur in silence e.g. you could take yourself out to eat or go to the cinema, alone.   

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7. Stop comparing yourself

Newsflash. You are never going to magically morph into whoever it is that you compare yourself to, so just stop. Especially if it’s a comparison rooted in bitterness/jealousy. It’s a cliché and I’m sure you’ve heard this golden oldie before but comparison is the thief of joy. I’ve written about the dangers of comparison and how you can turn your envy of others into the betterment of yourself, read more on this here.


Remember, failure to learn to love yourself fully can result in you seeking love and validation from all the wrong places. It leaves an incompleteness that can potentially stop you from achieving all the greatness you’re destined for. Don’t let anyone dictate to you your worth but God… and we already know how amazing God thinks you are!

Here are a few gentle reminders, just for you:

  • You are God’s very own wonderful creation. God’s works are wonderful. Read Psalm 139:13-14
  • God created you in His own image, now that’s saying something! Read Genesis 1:27
  • You are precious. The same God that made this incredibly beautiful and complex world made you. And He has placed you just below angel status and crowned you! Read Psalm 8:3-5
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I hope this post has helped someone on their journey to self-love or even just given you some healthy action points to work into your life. What are some of your favourite ways to practice self-love? Share them in the comments below 🙂


God bless you!

Wunms. 

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. 8 “I [Jesus] tell you, whoever publicly acknowledges me before others, the Son of Man will also acknowledge before the angels of God. —  Luke 12:6-8

 

You may also enjoy:
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52 thoughts on “7 Ways To Practice Self-Love, Starting Now!

    1. Yup – the blogging industry is a beast of its own! There’s pressure to conform, write about a certain thing, look a certain way and even take photos in a certain way with a certain camera. But that’s all just nonsense. You can blog however you want to. You can do it – no blog is like yours because you’re you. Going to check you out now, thanks for reading 💖

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  1. Very good points and I totally agree with all of them. The one I am working on is getting to know myself alone and what I enjoy that makes me happy and doesn’t allow me to compare myself. Like being self content with myself.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post! Complimenting yourself is key and definitely something I used to struggle with- but it’s crazy how people (mostly the opposite sex) will take advantage of someone with low self-esteem. You need to own your slay!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Very good point! We definitely shouldn’t rely on others to build our self esteem. & You’re so right, a lot of people (ahem *some men*) take advantage of people with low self esteem, usually when they have issues and insecurities themselves that they want to take out on someone and/or control!!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Aww yay, I’m glad you enjoyed it 😁

      Hope you can take comfort in the fact that you’re definitely not alone in the struggle, seems to be a very common thing. So happy to hear you’re learning how to love yourself more though, you’re amazing! ❤️❤️❤️

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  3. Enjoyed reading this Wunmi, totally agree with all of it. It is important to be positive and learn to forgive yourself when you fall short of your own expectations otherwise you can be consumed by regrets, it’s never go late to achieve what you dream of. It’s important to want what you have, not have what you want to be content. I found always trying helps when you look back on what you failed at, not trying leads to regret. Agree you shouldn’t compare, this leads to you feeling inferior. If you plan what you want to achieve and try you will be content. Always remember those you, think have more will have their own regrets and issues and may not be happy. Great post Wunmi

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    1. Very wise words – particularly that last part about those you envy having their own regrets and issues. That’s very true. Thanks for sharing that Gavin! And as always, thank you so much for reading 😊

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  4. Taking care of yourself is a HUGE one I think people overlook frequently. Glad you mentioned it here! Some things can slip when you get overwhelmed by a routine, but as you’ve touched on, it’s important to always take time to re-center.

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    1. It’s really difficult not to compare sometimes tbh. But going back to point #1, I find that if you develop gratitude for your successes and your position in life, you’ll focus on staying in your own lane and bettering yourself… so then what everyone else is doing shouldn’t really matter! It’s definitely a process though. Thanks for reading! 💖

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  5. Great post Wunmi! The older I get, the more I realise the importance of self love. Gratitude is so important, I’ve got a journal where I write all the things God has done for me and all the prayers he has answered so when I get discouraged, I read it.

    Working on yourself is also a big one , we should always strive to be better than who we were yesterday. Love what you said; complacency breeds mediocrity. xx

    Coco Bella Blog 

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    1. Thanks for your comment Demilade! And for sharing how you practice gratitude, I’m sure that’s going to help someone reading this 🙂

      And I definitely agree – I love when I level-up in any aspect of life, it’s exciting 💃🏽 x

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